11.23.09
Posted in Beliefs at 9:22 am by admin
check out parts 1 and 2 if you want to catch up…
Yup, still thinking about resurrection. So far it has been a humbling, tranformative journey and this week was particularly joyful. I was impressed by what meanings resurrection might hold in my life. Things like:
redemption
grace
reconciliation
healing
Over the past couple of weeks I’ve been blessed with the opportunity to reconnect with a very dear friend, experience the first steps towards a healed relationship that has been broken and hurting for a long time and be reminded of the inherent dignity and worth of humanity as we are all image-bearers of the Creator.
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10.21.09
Posted in Beliefs, Personal at 2:38 pm by admin
More thoughts on what the resurrection means in my personal life… (Click here for the first post in this series)
My nature is often deeply critical and quick to judge others by what I see without ever giving them a chance to truly be known. This sinful flaw in my character has recently been under intense scrutiny as I delve deeper into how the resurrection plays out in my life. I am reminded daily of C.S. Lewis’s words from The Weight of Glory:
“There are no ordinary people. You have never talked to a mere mortal…. Next to the Blessed Sacrament itself, your neighbor is the holiest object presented to your senses.”
If I believe that to be true then why can’t I get my actions to line up with my beliefs? I resonate with Paul when he bemoans the fact that his actions are in-congruent with the tenets of his soul.
So I started putting my belief into practice with the first test being how I responded internally to the people I come across in daily interactions. Lets take a bus ride as an example. I’m riding the #14 down Hawthorne, happily minding my own business…probably reading or listening to music on my ipod. Next thing you know, we’ve stopped and the driver is letting a few new passengers board the bus. A teenager passes by me on her way to the back of the bus. The music from her earphones is loud enough for me to hear above my own ipod and she yells at the top of her lungs to someone she recognizes. The very first thought that pops into my head is what an obnoxious and disrespectful person she is.
Next an older man shuffles on board and takes a seat directly in front of me. Frankly, he stinks. And he’s mumbling something unintelligible. Again, I’m annoyed and somewhat repulsed. Lastly, a couple with a screaming child settle into seats near the front of the bus. The woman is visibly upset with her tantrum-throwing two year old and keeps tugging on him while the man slumps back and ignores the situation. My immediate assessment: poor mothering skills on her part and absolute laziness on his and I won’t even share what I thought of their toddler. All this in about a minute and a half. It takes me only thirty seconds more to catch myself and rewind the whole thought process in my head; asking God’s forgiveness for my response to each person and trying my best to image them as He might see them. It’s harder than I think.
But this story gets to the very heart of this issue. It’s only one brief instance in life, particularly urban life where I am constantly interacting with society and confronted with hundreds of people to rub shoulders with on any given day. My prayer as this journey of discovery, conviction, and incarnation unfolds is that I will see the world through resurrection eyes. The eyes of Jesus who loves every one…yep I remind myself everyone.
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10.05.09
Posted in Beliefs, Personal at 3:35 pm by admin
So I finally read The Shack about a month ago and am already working my way through it a second time with Bryan. And it’s got me thinking. A lot actually. About a lot of things.
When I was in college, many many moons ago now, my world was fairly black and white. It was a nice season to live in since it didn’t require much angst in forming judgement calls about almost anything. It was either right or wrong. Good or bad. Period.
Now I find myself living in the gray space, and not having ready answers for pretty much anything is very frustrating. It’s made me a more thoughtful person and a more open person but ultimately it’s also made me a more frustrated person. There are lots of opportunities every day to somehow choose sides over an issue. Suddenly I find myself being that person who believes that there might be space in the middle and that it doesn’t constitute sitting on the fence, unwilling to commit to anything. This is a very foreign place to be.
Some of this thinking has been about resurrection and how my understanding of Christ’s resurrection should impact my daily life. If some part of us lives on eternally and perhaps even the world itself is made new not by decimating everything and starting over but by resurrecting some of what is here, what does that say about how we should treat ourselves, each other, and the world we live in?
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06.09.09
Posted in Beliefs, Personal at 6:20 am by admin
I was sitting outside Crema having coffee with a friend today. The sun was shining, the birds were singing…you get the picture. Next thing you know, the wind has picked up and there’s thunder and lightening.
Sometimes storms just creep up unannounced and pour on you. The weather is unpredictable. Life is unpredictable. I got to thinking about how I’ve often been caught in a downpour that rocked my foundations. Trouble came unexpectedly.
What do we do when a storm rolls through? Who do we turn to? I”ve seen a few nasty storm fronts in my time and while they can be scary it can also be a time of, oddly enough, reassurance. God is in control. So as the rain, thunder, and wind pass in about ten minutes here in Portland I am reminded that I can often blow things out of proportion in my own life and that stormy weather is a season, just like any other. This too shall pass…
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03.19.09
Posted in Beliefs, Personal at 7:32 am by admin
Sometimes we get in slumps. Like the one I’ve been in for awhile. The weather has been awful. My house is a shambles. I spend most of my time hunched over a laptop trying to get a job done that never seems to have an end in sight. I’ve gained weight. Exhaustion is constantly nipping at my heels.
Life is complicated. And messy. And it hurts.
So yesterday evening my husband and I did the only thing we know to do. We prayed. It’s amazing how much sits in my heart and comes to the surface when I seek the Lord’s face. Makes me wonder why we don’t do it all the time. We’re crazy not to hunger and thirst for that communion like it’s the sweetest thing on earth.
And God performed a miracle. It’s that simple and profound. We are covered by His Grace and I can still feel soft reverberations of awe, joy, and surprise. The sun came out yesterday. I had coffee with a friend who deeply encouraged me. And at the close of the day, after we had opened up our hands and given back to the Lord all that belongs to Him anyway, He turned around and blessed us in a very tangible way.
Thank you Jesus. You are faithful. You are good.
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11.22.08
Posted in Beliefs, Personal at 1:30 pm by admin
I took a picture of these during a walk the other day. It’s been so gorgeously sunny and crisp that walking instead of driving has been fun. Today I took the 14 to 28th and Hawthorne and then walked up to Evangel for a woman’s forum that Imago Dei was hosting. It’s a bit of a hike but I stopped for coffee at Crema and that turned out to be enough fuel to keep me going.
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09.22.08
Posted in Beliefs, Personal at 3:06 pm by admin
Advent Conspiracy 2008
Tired of those gifts you end up regifting or sending to Goodwill?
Bummed with how much money you spend at Christmas?
Watch the video above and be inspired to give relationally and help end the world’s water crisis.
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05.30.08
Posted in Beliefs, Personal at 9:33 am by admin
Recently there has been a good deal of attention focused on SE Portland and living a “missional” life. What does this mean though? Obviously I don’t have all the answers and neither do any of the folks involved in this conversation but we’re all feeling called to explore this idea together and we’ve defined a few things along the way.
First, missional living is local. It’s about the neighborhood you live in, the place(s) you work, the people you see on your commute (hopefully by bus or bike 
), and those you come in contact with when you purchase a latte or go grocery shopping. This is not to say that global missions have less value, they absolutely do not. However, this is simply an attempt to refocus individual hearts to be living intentionally and interacting with the lives that they come in contact with in every day life.
Secondly, it’s communal. You don’t run after Christ alone. There are other believers coming alongside you. This is about the church being family. Living in community can be a stretch for those of us who happen to be more introverted ( say, me on occasion) because it challenges individuals to not only be available to others but to pursue relationships. Be proactive.
The most challenging aspect of this heart attitude is that it happens every day. I am reminded of a sermon Rick McKinley preached a little over two years ago entitled “Cross-shaped Devotions” where he points out that Jesus calls us to pick up our cross and follow Him daily. This means seeking the face of God, being obedient, being faithful every day. The most convicting part for me is when he mentions how often the believer’s mindset is to lay down the cross “temporarily”. I’m going on vacation to the Bahamas for two weeks so I’m going to lay down my cross and I’ll pick it back up as soon as I get back. I’m choosing to sin and in that moment I’m laying down my cross. I don’t feel like it today so I’ll stow it away in my laundry room for another day. That kind of a mindset. And I am so guilty of this. I tend to embrace the first two, living in local communion but I do so sporadically. There are days when I don’t want to live missionally. The conviction for myself is that bearing that cross everyday does not mean giving up a 2-week trip to the Bahamas (heck no, I’d never turn that down) but it does mean living intentionally, seeking God even there. I believe God blesses each of us in different ways. In America, those blessings are pretty luxurious, like long trips to foreign countries and lots of fun perks in life that more than a third of the world couldn’t even imagine. I don’t think that cross-shaped devotion means we become monks and abstain from any of the “fun stuff”. It’s harder than that. It’s about relishing the gifts we’re given while not becoming distracted by the pleasures of this world and slipping God into our back pocket until we need him again.
A few parting thoughts. Living missionally is not a new “fad”, or at least it shouldn’t be. And it shouldn’t be happening just in SE Portland. God is EVERYWHERE. He has shown up and is working all over the place. We’ve been invited to join Him where He’s already at. Therefore, missional living, is more about joining God in His work then being “sent out”. I recommend listening to Michael Frost for a paradigm shift on that subject. Being missional doesn’t mean that we do an activity or volunteer in a program so that we can go home at night and check off the mission box on the list of “Christianity’s To-Does”, it means actively engaging the heart to love God and love people in all areas of life.
There is so much more to this conversation and to the working out of our faith as believers that this barely holds a candle to it all so please don’t take my few comments as the authority on what it means to “live missionally”. I am simply a fellow journeyer on the path to becoming more like Christ and welcome dialog that will help me be transformed.
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01.22.08
Posted in Beliefs, Politics at 3:02 pm by admin
Thanks to Jamie, I took this quiz that matches your personal political views with the 2008 candidates. Admittedly, you do need to have some knowledge of what agendas are on the table right now in order to be able to answer some of the questions. My results are posted below. While I would never vote for Mitt Romney, I found it interesting how high his name came up in my final scores. I’d love to say that Huckabee or Tancredo have a fighting chance but I find it very unlikely.
If you’re looking for a website that will spit out where candidates stand on the issues check out this website.
84% John McCain
79% Mitt Romney
77% Fred Thompson
75% Mike Huckabee
68% Tom Tancredo
63% Rudy Giuliani
51% Ron Paul
50% Hillary Clinton
46% John Edwards
45% Barack Obama
43% Bill Richardson
41% Joe Biden
40% Chris Dodd
28% Mike Gravel
23% Dennis Kucinich
2008 Presidential Candidate Matching Quiz
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01.09.08
Posted in Beliefs, Literary Pursuits, Personal at 1:01 pm by admin
There is a class I’ll be attending this quarter that promises to be particularly challenging, if not frighteningly maddening. The topic is gender and rhetoric which is not my strong suit, partially my reason for taking the class. However, the true topic of the class is feminism and rhetoric, which also interests me and again-not my strong suit. The only frustrating part is every one else enrolled for the class. I think mid-way through the two hour seminar I had the intense urge to start banging my head against the table in front of me.
First off, there’s the young undergraduate (by the way, I’ve turned into a complete snob and I despise taking classes with undergraduates. I’d like to petition that the amount of time and money I’m spending on my Masters entitles me to classes with only my peers present) who has lots of high ideals and strong opinions but very little actual knowledge to back every thing up with. Then there’s the student sitting next to me who wanders off into the realm of her personal life for no apparent reason and feels the need to share with every one her emotions and current crises. Lastly, we have the highly intillectual and very opinionated bunch that won’t let the rest of us get a word in edgewise. In the academic community we’ve moved further down the rungs of Dante’s hell to poststructuralism (for those of you struggling with postmodernism in contemporary culture I’m here to tell you that that’s “so yesterday” in academic circles) and nothing makes sense anymore.
A large part of my problem, I know, is the fact that I’m not huge into theory because for the most part it doesn’t translate practically into the real world. I get easily fed up with going round and round about how to define “man” and “woman” (one suggestion was lactating and non-lactating individuals and there’s always simply “chair persons”) or whether it’s more beneficial to seek equality for all the oppressed or focus on special interest groups, of which I’m apparently one since I qualify as a woman.
All this to say that gender and rhetoric is going to stretch me and while I dread some of the fist fights (figurative of course) that we’ll all be engaging in, I am very excited to hear what the professor has to say. She is a brilliant woman who knows a lot about a lot of things which means I respect her opinion far more than any one else in the class, even if I disagree with some of her views.
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