05.16.08
Nearing the End
“I wanted a perfect ending…
Now, I’ve learned the hard way that some poems
don’t rhyme, and some stories don’t have a clear
beginning, middle and end. Life is about not knowing,
having to change, taking the moment and
making the best of it,
without knowing what’s going to happen next.
Delicious ambiguity.”
Gilda Radner, 1946-1989
These days one season tends to blend into another. I find myself mulling over hopes, dreams, aspirations, callings, feelings without ever arriving at that moment of stark revelation when, with a sharp intake of breathe, the world seems to pause for a moment, doff it’s hat at you for discovering some great, true meaning and leave you stunned and elated. I remember experiencing moments like that in high school and college and perhaps there are some still in my future but for now, it feels more like I am gently floating on a wide river where the rhythm of the water changes and there are still storms but everything is continual, nothing too abrupt.
Perhaps I am simply waxing sentimental as my last quarter of full time classes at Portland State wraps up and I prepare to move into a new stage. I am not, however, being launched but simply placing one foot in front of the other until I find myself someplace that I was meant to go, without even knowing it.
So here’s to a summer of possibilities, a new season of hope and restoration, and the chance to chase a few more dreams.
Courtney said,
May 22, 2008 at 11:14 am
Perhaps there is something more real about it this way — that life continues to be about daily worship and daily living, not necessarily a life-stopping fork in the road. It sounds peaceful.